|Stewart Moves Away|
|Season 5, Episode 109|
|Air date||January 5, 1995|
Top O' the Mountain
The duo discover Stewart's house empty without anyone home, and later encounter a pair of Moving Men taking all the Stevensons' good stuff and breaking all the bad stuff. they then tell Beavis and Butt-head to locate any good merchandise and tell them they might be movers like them. Without anything secret found(sans Mr. Stevenson's stack of dirty magazines), the Moving Men leave and tell the duo to break everything around Stewart's house. Later the Stevensons get back home and find it wrecked. Mr. Stevenson asks what happened around the house and also where the couch and TV disappeared too. The duo then say that the Moving Men took them, but it was revealed that the Stevensons were robbed. Mrs. Stevenson comes across Mr. Stevenson's dirty magazines, which Mr. Stevenson blames Stewart for having. The duo leave the house as Mrs. Stevenson beats Mr. Stevenson and he beats Stewart and thought the Stevensons' "new house" sucked worse than their current one.
[We open at Stewart's house, where Beavis and Butt-Head are trying to get one of the windows open to sneak inside.]
Butt-Head: I'm gonna kick Stewart's ass!
Beavis: Yeah! I can't believe he moved the Hide-A-Key! Bunghole!
[The two manage to finally get aside, and make their way towards the living room. Butt-Head turns on the TV and changes it over to one of the Pay-Per-View channels, namely, the porn channel.]
Announcer: Warning. The following feature presentation is not rated. It contains scenes of full frontal nudity and extreme violence. Viewer discretion is advised.
Beavis: YES!! YES!!
Butt-Head: Discretion is cool!
Beavis: PAY-PER-VIEW RULES!! IT RULES!!
[But as they begin watching their beloved porno, two burglars break down the front door.]
Butt-Head: WHOA!! Uhh, who are you guys?
Harlan: We're the damn moving men! Who the hell are you?!
Butt-Head: Uhh, these dudes that Stewart knows.
Ross: Yeah? Well, he don't live here no more!
[This doesn't seem to phase Beavis and Butt-Head at all, as the two burglars begins robbing the house right in front of them. The duo continue watching the porno movie.]
Beavis: WHOA, CHECK IT OUT, BUTT-HEAD!! A NAKED CHICK!!
Harlan: [He steps in front of the TV and unplugs it.] Maybe you didn't hear me! Your little pal moved away, so get the hell out!
Beavis: COME ON, GET OUTTA THE WAY, THERE'S A NAKED CHICK!!!
Butt-Head: Yeah, Butt-munch!
Harlan: [He throws them across the room.] I SAID GET OUT!!
Butt-Head: These guys are cool!
Harlan: [He looks over the pair of chairs the duo were sitting on.] Hmm! His and her Barker Loungers! Might be worth something...
Ross: [He walks up with Stewart's chemistry set.] Check it out, Harlan! It's one of them "smoking devices"! [They both laugh at the thought.]
Butt-Head: Uhh, that's Stewart's chemistry set.
Beavis: Yeah. I can show you how to melt the carpet with it.
Ross: [Throws it on the ground, breaking it.] Oops! [He and Harlan laugh.]
Butt-Head: I thought moving men aren't supposed to break stuff?
Harlan: Listen here, punk! We don't have any use for this kind of crap! We just want the good stuff! [He proceeds to smash a glass stand with his foot.]
Ross: See?! CRAP! [They laugh some more.]
Butt-Head: [He has become enamored at their destruction.] These are the coolest dudes I have ever seen!
Beavis: Yeah! Me too!
Harlan: [He then picks up the TV they were watching.] Now, on the other hand, this TV, for example. See, I can get about 100 bucks for this baby!
Ross: [Walks by, carrying another TV.] Uhh, Harlan, buddy! [He signals for him to hurry up so they can leave.]
Harlan: Uhh... Tell ya what, boys. You help us locate the quality merchandise around this dump, and you can movers like us someday!
Butt-Head: We wanna be the kind of movers that take all the cool stuff!
Beavis: Yeah, and then take all the crap, AND BREAK IT!! BREAK IT, YEAH!!!
Harlan: See, you boys are quick learners!
[The boys then take Ross and Harlan around the house, but end up wasting their time looking for useless things, such as clothes from Mrs. Stevenson's underwear drawer.]
Butt-Head: There's plenty of cool stuff in here.
Beavis: [He pulls out a support bra.] WHOA!!! THIS IS PRETTY COOL!
Butt-Head: Yeah, check it out!
Beavis: Her boobs aren't too big, but when she wears it...
Ross: Dammit, quit screwing around!
Harlan: Let me explain, boys. We're looking for anything, you know, hidden or secret. You know, like nobody knows about it.
Butt-Head: Uhh, I know! Hey, Beavis... [He leans and whispers something to him. Harlan believes they may be onto to something, as they begin to dig through Mr. Stevenson's closet.]
Harlan: Keep going, boys! You're bound to find something cool!
Butt-Head: [He and Beavis reveal a rather large collection of porno magazines.] Here it is, dudes!
Beavis: Yeah! Stewart's dad's dirty magazines!
Butt-Head: We tore out all the pages with butts on them, but there's still plenty of good boobs left!
Ross: [He taps Harlan on the shoulder.] Yo, Harlan! We gotta hit the road, man!
Harlan: [He throws a bag over his shoulder.] Thanks anyways, boys. Maybe next time.
Butt-Head: Hey, wait! So, like, when do we get to be movers?
Beavis: Yeah, really! When do we get to break stuff?
Harlan: Well, yeah, why don't you boys practice breaking stuff around the house. But, we gotta be moving on!
[We then cut to Harlan and Ross loading up all the stolen items in the back of their van, while Beavis and Butt-Head watch as they drive away.]
Butt-Head: Someday, Beavis, that will be us. Well, we better get started breaking stuff. [He goes inside to start trashing the place, breaking everything in sight.]
Beavis: Yeah, and practice! [He starts kicking the door frame over and over.] YEAH, YEAH!! BREAK IT!! BREAK IT, YEAH!!
[Later on, we see the Stevenson's house has been completely destroyed by Beavis and Butt-Head.]
Butt-Head: Uhh, I guess that's everything, Beavis.
Beavis: Let's, like, break everything again!
Butt-Head: [He hears the family pulling into the driveway.] Uhh, they're back.
Beavis: I bet they'll hire us!
Butt-Head: Yeah! We did a good job!
[But once the Stevensons enter the house, their reactions are not what the two expected them to be, as they are horrified at the destruction.]
Beavis: Hey, how's it going?
Mr. Stevenson: [He walks up to the duo, enraged.] BEAVIS!! BUTT-HEAD!! WHAT HAPPENED?!? WHERE'S THE COUCH?!? WHERE'S THE TV?!?
Butt-Head: Uhh, the movers took it, dude.
Mr. Stevenson: [He screams in rage.] MOVERS?!?! YOU IDIOTS!!! WE'VE BEEN ROBBED!!!
Butt-Head: Robbed?? We were here all day! We didn't see any robbers!
Stewart: You guys are in BIG trouble!
Mrs. Stevenson: [She picks through the wreckage...] Who's dirty magazine is this?? [...and finds several magazines.] WET HOOTERS?!? [She angrily stares at Mr. Stevenson.]
Mr. Stevenson: [He starts to panic.] Uhhh, I... Hell, I don't know! Stewart?!
[As they start having a huge dispute about what has happened, Beavis and Butt-Head decide to leave.]
Beavis: Hey, Butt-Head. How come Stewart's dad's so pissed?
Butt-Head: I don't know. Maybe their new house sucked worse than this one.
Beavis: Yeah. [He starts imitating Mr. Stevenson's freakout.] "WE GOT ROBBED!!! WE GOT ROBBED!!!"
Butt-Head: [He laughs at Beavis' impression.] Yeah! What a dork! [The two start laughing.]
- The Moving Men's first appearances.